Bernie’s year of Ben & Jerry pales to Hillary’s one pint of EmpowerMint
|1. Hillary in Wall Street’s pocket. 2. Hillary and Bernie make up. 3. Hillary steals Bernie’s thunder with Ben and Jerry. 4. Hillary reenacts a popular Bible story to attract the Christian right’s vote.|
In 2008, I covered the Democratic and Republican parties at their respective conventions, and when I say “parties” I mean the cocktail parties hosted by the International Franchise Association in both Denver and Minneapolis for congressional members they supported and local IFA bigwigs. While walking to the convention site along the 16th Street Mall in Denver one sunny day, I spotted a vendor selling Obama action figures. The six-inch-tall doll was part of the Einstein collection being sold in bookstores. I asked if I could also buy a George W. Bush doll, but the artist/businessman turned up his nose and said he only made “geniuses.”
For eight years, Obama has resided on my bookshelf at work. He’s never been out of his original box, and while that may sound like I’m making a political statement, I’m not. When one of my stepsons got behind Bernie Sanders during the 2016 primaries, I ordered a “Join the Action” Bernie doll for him. For another stepson who is teased about playing Barbies with his sister as a kid (a good way to irritate his older brother who wanted him to play ball outside), I ordered the Hillary Clinton doll. Spoiler alert: She doesn’t have the figure Barbie does, nor the wardrobe. Hillary is wearing the infamous pantsuit in blue. Sadly there is no Trump doll in this collection because there were 104 serious Republican candidates running early on. (What’s with the Republicans that no one’s a doll?)
Bernie, along with Hillary, arrived on my doorstep the day after the Democratic Convention downloaded its patriotic balloons. For a Bernie supporter like my stepson, it was too little, too late. Bernie had already gone home and changed his shirt—and party affiliation.
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That might have been the end of it but for another fortuitous event (plus I was desperate for column fodder, having used up two good ideas in blog posts). I received an email touting an Instagram contest where the best picture of you and your Bernie Action Figure won a year’s worth of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream. Bernie, Ben and Jerry are all from Vermont and the founders of the ice cream franchise are socially liberal as well.
Doll owners are urged to take pictures of their Bernie doll in innovative settings, similar to the Gnome that traveled the world for Travelocity. However, I don’t think it’s fair that Bernie gets his own contest. Therefore, I am proposing that in addition to taking pictures of our Bernie Action figure, we also take pictures of our Hillary “Ready for Action” figure in fun settings.
Above are mine. Please send me your pics. I won’t promise a year’s worth of Vermont’s finest ice cream, maybe something a little closer to a New York minute of my attention span.